pics continued..

more of the birthday celebration and time in the mountains..

May 2010

Let's see so much catch up..

Well, Keaton finished his first year in school, he is officially a kindergarten graduate. How did I get a first grader, that happened way to fast.

He also turned 6 years old, of course we had 2 birthday parties, one with one side of the family and some friends from school and Church. and then one of them up at Phil's cabin, which is Keaton's favorite place to be, he could live there..his theme this year was basketball..he loves it..

I love him soooo much, there are days when I wonder how I will keep all the hair attatched to my head, since I would love to pull it all out, but he is turning into such a great kid, so smart, he got an award for reading 50 books at school, he is doing well, and has such a personality, and of course he is a little bit gorgeous, soooo..yeah, a little bragging there from mommy..but enough of that, here are some pics..

What a Poser!!!

And not in the lame way...this kid is going through a phase, where whenever I want to take a picture he poses so silly like this..it is funny..but seriously, when I want a picture, he won't take a serious one..

Easter

And then there was Easter..UGH...It was not my favorite this year. it was Easter and General Conference, which was a little much all at once, because on Easter, I was to busy to really enjoy conference with baking and cooking for family functions, and from the weekend of Easter Candy, My kids were unhinged, and I was ready to sell them to the highest bidder..anyways here it was..

Catch up Time..

So this was the first year Keaton was in Baseball..T-Ball to be exact.. He is a Florida Marlin. I have to say it is pretty hysterical watching 5 year olds play ..The competitive side of me, wishes it was a little more..well...competitive. for T-ball they call it 3 and a treat..meaning 3 innings then your done, and you get a treat..lol.. and no one wins. or they all win I guess. which is cute, but I want to see some action..c'mon this is why I have my boys, so I can be "That Parent" at a ball game, screaming and yelling..lol..

The other day Keaton was on First base, and the guy behind him hit his ball, so he started running to 2nd base, well...he noticed the little guy on the other team having trouble getting the ball to try and get Keaton out, so Keaton stops running to 2nd and goes and help the other guy get the ball..lol, he was totally helping the other team..I love that he is being nice and helpful, but we had to have a talk about helping his team..

here are a few pics..

Life with a boy...

So....Keaton gets a small allowance, and is always ready to remind us of payday. He states.."I want my Dollar", well what have you done this week..look at your room it is a mess.

5 minutes later..."Mom, I cleaned my room reall GOOD..come see..this is what I find.

needless to say he gets his cleaning skills from me, As a child, I mean..This was my idea of a clean room growing up, My mother always said, I hope you have a child that is just like you some day. I would always laugh, and say, well I am pretty cool, so I hope so too.. After living with this little stinker for almost 6 years, I am finding out that Yes he is like me, and..well, I am gonna feel real bad for his future wife, if she ever came home to this, with him saying..Honey, don't worry about it , I cleaned up the house while you were out. :)

Getting back to ME!!!!!! :) very long and probably boring, sorry.

I usually don't use my blog to blog about me., A- I really hate talking about myself much, I mean, sure on the phone when people ask how's life, I tell them, but putting personal stuff about me on the internet freaks me out a little bit, not for security reasons, I am just a little shy about ME, so I am pretty to myself. Okay, that was WAY to much explaning but anywhoo.

I am going to write a post about me, well, kind of, just something that I have been thinking about for a long time, and it might get a little wordy, so if you have any ADD at all, you probably won't wan't to read this.

for years, I have had the same struggle in my life, or my married life, I should say. the struggle to "multiply and replenish" the earth if you will. :)

I have been married for 8 years this past November, I have 2 wonderful Beautiful children, both boys, and I love them more than anything. But it was not fun, trying to get either one of them here, it was painful physically and emotionally and even financially challenging at one point. I would never take back those experiences for anything, although, I hated the time that I was desperatly trying, and all the crying and bitterness, it brought me my boys, and I am grateful for them. As I have looked back though, I have noticed one thing...I forgot me. I think I checked out of "my" life for a while, I was so in to " oh my gosh, I have to have a crap load of kids and I can't" kind of thinking that I just put "me" on the backburner.

I mean, I use to have things I loved to be involved in, one of which was music, I have loved music, since my first one man band set I got as a Christmas gift when I was young. Something about it, is so serene to me, it can take me from sad to happy in a moment's notice, It has always healed me, when I needed it. I relate everything through music.

I kind of forgot that for a while. A- I am super shy, and so most people don't even know that I have any musical ability at all, I am pretty private about it, and almost prefer that no one knows, so why I am posting this on my blog is a really good question. But I have made a decision..I am taking back Erica, not Erica the Wife, daughter or Mother. but just Me. I have things I love to do , I am gonna do them. I need to "get a life" I guess you would say.

Yesterday I saw this and posted this on Facebook. this girl is an amazing singer, songwriter, guitar player, etc. and I just had this chill run up me, and this voice saying, You need to get back to this kind of stuff. I have this guitar sitting in my closet in it's case with so much dust on it, Now, I can only play a little, but I have decided to take it out, start playing and practicing again and hey, maybe even write a song. Music is a healer to me, and it hit me , this whole time I have been stuggling in my life, through many different things, I put aside one of the things that always helped me most. Well No more.

I am so excited about this, I know it does not sound like much to anyone, but I am so happy to feel like I can live again. I might not fit into the cookie cutter mold like I think I need to, but I am Me, and I have some things I can do, and I am gonna start doing them again, who knows where it could lead me. propably nowhere exciting..lol, but to a much happier place that's for sure.

I know now, that the trials I have , are something that I have been trusted with. I think The Lord has much more faith in me than I do in myself. And it's almost like that Epiphany just hit me for some reason. I am stong, and I will make it , no matter what. but what's wrong with a little extra happiness in there somewhere.

Okay, I am sure none of this made sense, but I just had to get it off my chest,and shoulders this thing I have been carrying around for so long all by myself at times. I give it back. I take me back. and am looking foward to the peace, I know it will bring me.

Everyone's life is different, I am grateful for my life, my Family, Kids, friends, and yes even my trials. It has made me stronger and more resiliant.

Here is the video, That started this all for me. Priscilla Ahn, is amaing and has inspired me.